Yin Yang Stars
The Valley of Nep
The Valley of Nep was named after Neptune because the earth of the valley contained crushed blue-green crystals of aquamarine – the colour of sea water and the colour of planet Neptune. It is said that long ago, gulls gathered in the hills surrounding the valley to watch a seagull fly. The seagull had the Mars bug, like Jonathan Livingston Seagull before him. He was a loner trying to perfect his flight, and while he mastered the wind and challenged his wings, gulls from across the land came to this valley to watch him.
No one knew who he was, where he came from, what his character was like, or anything else about him. All they knew was that his flight was magical and mesmerizing and out of this world. There were gulls who came for a day or two to watch the spectacle, but there were gulls who stayed forever. These were the gulls who came to love – some would even say to worship – the seagull in the sky. They didn’t know him, but each one formed an idea of who he was, an idea of perfection; he was the ideal seagull. The gulls that stayed forever in the valley loved their perfect and ideal seagull, and in their daydreams, the seagull loved them back perfectly.
Like the movie stars we fantasized about when we were young.
The Valley of Nep became the realm of platonic love, and like any other kind of love, it has weight and it travels through time and space. The gulls’ profound love reached the seagull and pushed him to be perfect. The seagull worked harder and tried more and more difficult maneuvers, until he crossed to the other side and became perfect; perfectly divine.
Planet Neptune had been watching and waiting, and when the seagull crossed to the other side, he welcomed him as one of his sacred birds. “Only a seagull that has inspired pure love in the hearts of so many gulls can become one of my Seagulls from Heaven,” Neptune told him.
Back in the valley, the gulls remained in the hills feeling utterly bereft. Their seagull was gone. Had they been human, they would have built a temple in the seagull’s name and worshipped him there; but they were only gulls. Neptune took pity and transformed them into aquamarine crystals that slowly crushed and mixed with the earth. The valley took on a blue-green tinge and he declared it to be his valley – the Valley of Nep.
“Let the power of my valley infused with pure love inspire your creations and your relationships,” he said. “Come back here if you have a creative block or if you need to mend a broken heart. God only knows there will be many with Venus in charge of relationships. If her boiling hot cauldron of lava burns you, come to my valley to heal: go see a psychologist and analyze your problems, read books that will help, watch your favourite movies and cry all you want. Come here to remember what perfect love feels like, but don’t stay too long; I’m addictive.”
“Exactly,” said Venus. “Neptune may be my higher octave and your source of inspiration, but he’s addictive. Too much Neptune and perfect love, and you’ll never want to come back to reality. That’s why he’s an outer planet and I’m not. I’m the one who walks with you on earth to do the work you need to do to look good, feel good, and make the relationship you dream about come true. Or in the case of the three women who wanted to write a play: Neptune’s Seagulls inspired them, but I handed them the pen. The images were my idea too.”
Three women writing a play by Fernand Léger, 1921-22
Valley of Sat
Long ago, people in the Valley of Sat feared Mars. Actually they didn’t really fear Mars, they feared his colour. Whenever he glowed blood-red in the night sky, people’s survival instincts kicked in and they got ready for battle. Mars didn’t understand yet that getting ready for battle didn’t necessarily mean people wanted to fight. It confused him when people got ready to fight and then prayed to him to keep war at bay and made sacrifices to appease him.
As a result, sometimes there was war and sometimes there was peace, with no predictable pattern.
One day, Saturn walked through the valley and saw people in full armour making sacrifices to his nephew Mars. They all held a spear in one hand, and a sacrificial knife in the other. When Saturn looked up at the sky, he saw Mars toss a coin: heads meant war and tails meant peace.
Boy oh boy, thought Saturn. Did he ever need to protect this nephew of his. “Order!” he cried, and from that day on, people in the Valley of Sat had to make a choice when Mars became visible in the sky: pray and make sacrifices for peace or get ready for war. No more of this wishy washy stuff in between that confused Mars and made him resort to a coin.
Saturn now rules the Valley of Sat like he rules his magnificent rings. In the sky, he has shepherding moons that keep all that ring material floating in orderly and circular paths. In his valley, he has built structures where people can direct their Mars-energy in an orderly and hierarchical manner. There are structures for every field imaginable, like music and defence, the culinary arts and medicine, government and fashion. There are structures outside the structures of labour, for the homeless and the nomads, the travellers and adventurers. The shepherding moons for all the structures in his valley are the established codes of conduct. There are structures for those who break the codes of conduct as well. Saturn is a planet of structure and his valley is always in order.
“I wish,” said Saturn. “That’s textbook Saturn, by the way; I’m not so rigid. To begin with, I’m a gassy planet and my rings and structures are in constant flux and change. I don’t build structures to suffocate you; I build them to give your Mars-energy direction. If everybody knows in which direction they’re going, it’s easier for Mars to walk with you. He won’t have to toss a coin to figure you out. Besides, everybody needs to put their energy into good use, otherwise it sits and accumulates and you either fester or turn rogue. So if it’s time for you to decide on your life path, or you need to change the one you’re on, come visit my valley and get a taste of all the structures available. I can help you build new ones too. But by golly, make a choice and get inside one; I can’t have you running around structureless.”
“I thought Saturn would extinguish my blood-red glow when he was assigned to be my higher octave,” said Mars. “For the longest time, I missed the hunter-gatherers of the Palaeolithic age who did just fine without Saturn’s structures. I know this is going to sound pretty new age, but they were one with mother earth. They understood her rhythms and spoke to her, and she spoke back to them. They were the most intense people I have ever known; they could be ferociously wild and deeply tender as well. Survival was all that mattered and I was unrestrained. My presence in the sky did not scare them; on the contrary, they welcomed me. I reminded them of having survived another day, of sitting around the fire in the safety of their cave, drumming and dancing, storytelling and making art.”
“Then I understood something about Saturn that changed my whole perspective,” Mars continued. “He’s an outer planet because structures are not the endgame. It’s what you do inside them that matters – and that includes changing the structures themselves or breaking them down if they do not serve you well. That’s why you walk on earth with me and not him. The endgame is the work you do with me.”
Decorated cave in the Grotte Chauvet-Pont d’Arc, Ardèche ( dated 32,000 to 30,000 years BP)
Jupiter wanted to be a Sun, the second life source of planet earth. A bit more mass and he would have self-ignited; but he didn’t. Instead, he became the earth’s shield. His strong gravitational-pull attracts comets and asteroids to his surface and prevents them from hitting the earth and the rest of the inner planets. Jupiter is our protector and our higher octave.
We feel Jupiter’s hand in all the narrow escapes we have and the windfalls that save us. He shakes the bookshelf and a book that changes our lives falls into our lap. He gives us a push and we bump into someone who gives us crucial information. He snaps his fingers, and we turn around and see something we needed to see.
He teaches us to have faith in the world.
In essence, Uranus is the spirit of freedom and rebellion. He lies on his belly and rolls on his equator – daring you to do the same.
He shows you the loopholes in your Saturn structures, shocks your Venus with the jolie-laide and beau-laid vogue; he teaches your Mars to be creative and your Mercury to be inventive. Jupiter is his best friend and he’s the higher octave of the Yin Yang Angels.
Beau comme Maman
Pluto is the shaman of the zodiac. He purifies us from time to time. His purification ceremony can be as small as a comment someone makes about us or as big as a crisis in our lives that makes us confront ourselves.
Pluto holds up the mirror and asks: Who are you really? What are the limitations that your character, psychology and physical body impose on you? What are you capable and not capable of doing? He holds our hand as we painfully peel off layers of pretense and come to terms with who we are.
His purification carves the ego to a more genuine state and reveals to us what our true octave is: this is who I am.
Young Man by the Sea by Hippolyte Flandrin, 1855
Dancing with Pluto
I’m not always purifying you; I’m also a regular shaman who comes to bless every stage of your life: graduations, promotions, marriages, and so on. I like to keep things moving forward. If I see that you’re stuck in a pattern and stagnating, I’ll tap your shoulder and ask you to dance with me. I’m aware that I’ve been downgraded to dwarf planet, but that doesn’t diminish my power. If I ask you to dance, don’t say no.
If you say no to him, he’ll ask me to take over. Look what happened to Venus when she wouldn’t stop fighting with Mars about Bride of the Forest. She had seen how Mars had looked at the Bride after the triathlon – the admiration in his eyes. She couldn’t get the scene out of her head and it made her burn with jealousy. She accused Mars of being attracted to the Bride, of not loving her enough, of not looking at her the same way. Mars kept trying to reassure her, that he loved her, that what he felt for the Bride was pure admiration, look how she had performed at the triathlon, her strength, her will power. This only infuriated Venus even more. All the while, Pluto kept asking Venus to dance with him, but she completely ignored him.
When Pluto signalled to me to take over, I asked Comet Halley to make an appearance. Are you familiar with him? He’s the Adonis of the sky, the epitome of male beauty. Captivated by his beauty, Venus stopped fighting with Mars and followed Halley’s trajectory in the sky. When he disappeared, she looked at Mars and saw him looking at her. He wasn’t just looking at her, he was really looking at her with that half smile of his. He turned around ready to leave, when Venus put her arms around his waist and said she was sorry. .
Mars wanted to push her away and teach her a lesson, but before he could do that, I asked him to dance with me. He knew better than to say no. He is a man of many secrets and Uranus has a shocking way of revealing secrets. So he put his arm around Venus and said it was okay, now he knew how she felt about him admiring the Bride. He wanted to know if she still loved him or did she want to follow the Comet? She still loved him, she said. I left when they were ready to move forward, and went to ask good ol’ Merc to dance with me.
You may call me delusional or psychotic, or both delusional and psychotic when you read this, but I swear that what I’m about to write is true.
For a whole year, every time Pluto connected with Mercury in the sky, the Sky Map app on my phone would open up on its own. I don’t know if it was a hacker or divine intervention, but whenever Mercury and Pluto connected, I’d find Sky Map on my phone screen when I reached for my phone.
By the end of the year, I knew a lot about the stars and planets. One of the things I learnt is that when Pluto and Mercury connect, Pluto asks Merc to dance with him. If Merc is too busy to dance, Uranus cuts off the electrical power and internet, and leaves everyone suspended in time until Merc pays attention and dances with Pluto.
When they dance together, we receive information that transforms us in some way. The information we receive can be as subtle as a thought we have, a thought that changes our perception about something or someone in our lives. Sometimes, though, we can have a conversation or hear news that changes our lives forever. It all depends on the music Pluto plays.
The year that my phone did its own thing transformed the way I think. It’s actually kinda neat to see how in sync we are with the sky.
New Moon by Alex Colville, 1980
Yin Yang Eyes
Let’s say a little white car is a Saturn structure, and Pluto knocks on his door and asks him to dance. The little white car knows that if he refuses, Uranus will blow him up, so he agrees and says yes.
When he begins dancing with Pluto, the little white car is clumsy and runs over Pluto several times. Over time however, he improves and begins to dance like a pro. Delighted, Pluto awards him with ribbons of colour.
Jupiter happens to come by and Pluto asks him if he’d like to join their dance, and Jupiter agrees without hesitation. When the three of them start dancing together, Jupiter asks Pluto to make the car a little bigger; the little white car with ribbons of colour is so small he can hardly see him – he’s scared he’ll squash the poor thing. In response, Pluto triples the size of the little white car and gives him medals, so he’s now bigger and brighter and super easy to spot.
When Pluto dances with Saturn, and Jupiter joins in, little white cars become royalty.
Woodstock bus at the Bethel Woods Museum, 1960s
I was dancing with Neptune in the early 60s, trying to figure out how to make his dreams and hopes for a better future come true, when Uranus showed up in his little black car. He was smoking weed and feeling like a real individual, rebellious and free. When we asked him about smoking weed and driving, he told us the authorities didn’t bother him much: just a hippie having a groovy time.
It occurred to me that he was the ingredient Neptune and I were missing to get the 60s rolling. I had the power, Neptune had the dreams, and Uranus had the spirit of the times. I asked him to join our dance, and together we became a force to be reckoned with.
A demonstrator offers a flower to military police at an anti-Vietnam War protest at The Pentagon in Arlington, Virginia, 21 October, 1967
Uranus: Spirit of the times
Uranus takes approx. 84 years to travel around the zodiac, spending 6.5 to 8 years in each sign. His entry into each sign sets the tone for the remainder of his transit.
If you read all about what happened in the 60s, you’d think: Ah! Uranus must have been in fiery Aries stirring everyone up to revolt. But he wasn’t; he was in what is considered to be the most boring sign of all – Virgo. Traditionally, Virgo is the sign of the servant; the virgin serving others. In Inca times, she was sacrificed to the gods.
Let me tell you what actually happens when you enter the House of Virgo: the extraordinary becomes ordinary and the ordinary matters.
When a famous hockey player walks into a laser clinic because he wants to get rid of the hair on his back – he opens the door to the House of Virgo and becomes an ordinary, self-conscious man in need of help. When the Queen or the Dalai Lama get sick and are taken to the hospital, they open the door to the House of Virgo and become mortal human beings in need of treatment. Virgo has a way of equalizing everyone.
It was in Virgo that a black person, a peasant in the Andes and a woman mattered, and when Uranus came into the House of Virgo in the 60s, he stirred them up to be bold and to speak – and the subaltern spoke.
Machu Picchu by Tilsa Tsuchiya, 1974
We open the door to the House of Libra when we look for calm in the face of an imbalance: a dispute, an injustice, an irreconcilable point of view. Uranus made his entry into Libra soon after the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. to highlight that this is where the world needed to be.
Landmark for Peace by Greg Perry and Daniel Edwards, 1994
When George Lucas sensed that the world was in desperate need of a new death and rebirth myth, an updated version of the hero’s journey, he entered the House of Scorpio. Uranus joined him there and gave him the push he needed to write the final draft of the script for Star Wars. Lucas began filming six months later.
There is death and rebirth in a myth and in how we experience life, and there is death and rebirth in an orgasm. We are intimate with another in the House of Scorpio. With Uranus in Scorpio, secret love affairs and love affairs considered illicit by society came to the surface to change society’s views on sexuality.
On September 8, 1975, when Uranus was at 0 degrees Scorpio and beginning his transit there, Time magazine covered the story of an openly gay person.
It was also during the Uranus transit Scorpio period that Prince Charles began his affair with Camilla. Will he become king?
Leonard Matlovich on the cover of Time magazine, September 8, 1975
When we learn about the problems in the world, and we gather information to understand them better and to understand them from different points of view, we enter the House of Sagittarius. We are also here when we discuss possible solutions to those problems. With Uranus in Sagittarius, our proposed solutions may provoke divisiveness or a gut reaction of “how dare you!” This is certainly what Oliviero Toscani did in the 80s with his ad campaign for the Italian brand Benetton.
United Colors of Benetton Ad by Oliviero Toscani, 1986
The House of Capricorn is the house of power and authority. In 1988, Uranus rolled through Capricorn bringing down power structures that had lost all trace of credibility.
At the same time, the foundations for a digital structure that would take off when Uranus transited through Aquarius were laid while Uranus was in Capricorn. The day Tim Berners-Lee showed his proposal at CERN for a world wide web, a powerful geomagnetic storm struck the earth.
During the storm on March 13, 1989, magnetic waves caused a surge in power that left a couple million people without electricity in Canada. Upgrades were made to power plants around the world to withstand power surges in the future. These upgrades would help bring about the age of digital technology.
Artist’s depiction of solar wind striking the Earth’s magnetosphere (NASA)
When we make a statement that draws attention, we enter the House of Aquarius. In Aquarius, we are all equal in our own individual ways. With Uranus in Aquarius (1996-2003), the vibe was all about being unique and standing out in a crowd: Look at me! Listen to me! See what I can do! Everybody became an artist, and like everything else, art has a light and a shadow. It can be unimaginably creative, and it can be unimaginably destructive.
The National September 11 Memorial in New York
If there is a place of healing, it is the House of Pisces. Uranus in Pisces shook us out of grief, bringing us moments that uplifted our spirits and gave us hope for the future.
President Obama with Victory Boogie Woogie at the Gemeentemuseum, The Hague, March 2014
When we are born, we say I AM with our first cry, and we say it in the House of Aries.
When Uranus made his entry into the House of Aries in late 2010, he awakened Mars, ruler of Aries, and Mars cried I AM ALIVE. It was this spirit that led the Arab Spring. Thousands of people took to the streets to protest against oppressive regimes. Their energy rippled around the world and everyone wanted to feel as alive as they did. It was so contagious that even those who had nothing to protest against found something and took to the streets.
The City Rises by Umberto Boccioni, 1910
Uranus in the House of Taurus awakens passion; he awakens Venus.
When Uranus entered Taurus in 1935, he awoke passion to protect and defend our countries from the enemy.
“We shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”
– Winston S. Churchill
Soon after Uranus entered Taurus this year, Notre-Dame de Paris was ravaged by a fire. Firefighters desperately tried to save her, and a billion dollars poured in to restore her.
This time, Uranus in Taurus has awoken passion to preserve our heritage.
Lake and Mountains by Lawren Harris, 1928
Uranus was in in the House of Gemini during WWII, and it was the best place for it to be when people had to make life or death decisions. Gemini is all about the mind, and Uranus in Gemini sharpens the mind. Gemini is all about communication, and Uranus in Gemini speeds up communication. Gemini is clever, and Uranus in Gemini helps the good guys make the right decisions to win the war.
Uranus will begin his next transit through Gemini in 2025.
When you miss your parents and give them a call, or you take your partner out for dinner, or you stay home to play with your children, you open the door to the House of Cancer. Here is where you love and are loved.
Uranus entered Cancer in 1949 and it coincided with a hopeful surprise for many people back then and now. An accidental discovery of the cryoprotective properties led to experimentation with cryopreservation. Cryopreservation is the ability to freeze and thaw cells without damaging them, and every fertility clinic today uses this technique to freeze eggs, sperm and embryos (IVF). The year 1953 saw the first successful pregnancy from insemination of previously frozen sperm.
The first In-Vitro baby was born on July 25, 1978 (Uranus transit Scorpio).
The next Uranus transit Cancer will begin in 2032.
Family Wellness by Simone McLeod, 2016
When you’re a success and shine onstage, you open the door to the House of Leo. With Uranus in Leo, someone’s success may come to you as a shock and spur you to do better.
Uranus entered Leo during the Cold War, and soon after, the USSR launched Sputnik 1 and shocked the US. Uranus waited for this achievement to sink into the US psyche and then made his way to the theatre. He turned the solar power on and set up a ping pong table centre stage. He put the USSR on stage left and the US on stage right and said: may the most authentic team have the spotlight.
Uranus will make his way into Leo once again at the end of 2039 and will begin his transit there in May 2040. He will likely surprise us and show us a different side of this solar sign – only time will tell.
Convergence by Jackson Pollock, 1952
Valley of Hope
I’m Tyr from the Valley of Hope. All the phoenixes living in this valley are of a different colour. I happen to be a Tyrian Purple phoenix, so they call me Tyr.
People think that they end when they die, and I would argue and say that people don’t end when they die. When people die, they leave behind all that life revealed to them here on earth, in the air that we breathe. Their stories are in the air that we breathe.
When a human child is born, the child breathes in all the revelations left on earth with the first intake of air, and then cries I AM – I AM all that came before me, and all that came before me is the foundation I will stand on to become someone new.
The first time I burst into flames, Pluto paid attention to me. I was the first phoenix to live up to the myth of the phoenix rising from the ashes. I literally was reborn from the ashes of my previous body – the same colour too. It happened when Pluto was across from the Sun in the zodiac. The moment Pluto and the Sun faced each other at exactly 180 degrees, I burst into flames and rose again. That’s why I don’t believe people end when they die.
Usually when planets are in opposite signs, facing each other in a birth chart or in a transit, there’s tension between them and a demand to have an equal say. The key is to integrate both energies:
If Mars the Warrior is in Aries, eager to take a leap of faith, and Saturn the Protector holds a STOP sign in Libra, don’t let Saturn stop you. Just make sure you’re well-prepared before you act.
If the Sun, your Life Force, is in Virgo, working long hours, and Neptune the Mystic is in Pisces, sitting cross-legged and chanting Om, make sure to take some time off work. You want to stay centred.
The day I burst into flames, Pluto was in Scorpio and the Sun was in Taurus. Pluto, planet of transformation, was strong in his own sign and demanded change. The Sun in Taurus was also strong, but he was a steady and reliable energy. There was tension between a need for dramatic change and a need to remain the same. The idea was to integrate both energies, find a middle way, but my body responded to both energies equally: I changed dramatically to remain the same. Pluto was so impressed, he made me his sacred bird.
Globe chandelier from the Los Angeles Central Library
When I burst into flames on that fated day, my girlfriend panicked. Her name’s Flaming June and she’s an orange phoenix. She told me later that she prayed and prayed that the same wouldn’t happen to her – it looked terribly painful. I tried to reassure her, telling her that it probably would never happen to her because she already looked like a walking flame.
She wouldn’t talk to me for days after I said that. I wish she would just fight with me instead of giving me the silent treatment. I think it’s the Moon conjunct Mars in her birth chart gone bad. Ideally, the Moon should allow her Mars to get angry, argue and fight with the people she loves – without fear of losing them. But looks to me like the Moon has silenced her Mars. Sooner or later, her Mars is bound to break free and act out, and boy will I be relieved when that happens.
When I asked Flaming June to be my girlfriend, she showed me her birth chart so I’d understand what I was getting into. I still can’t believe how many conjunctions she has! She has the Moon conjunct Mars, and you know all about that. She also has Neptune conjunct Uranus in the career section of her chart. With Uranus, the planet of individuality and originality there, she wasn’t going to study something conventional – no way. She ended up becoming an astrologer, and the Neptune fusion makes her pretty intuitive.
Then she has Saturn conjunct Venus in the area of relationships. She may be unconventional in her profession, but she’s old fashioned when it comes to relationships. Saturn the Protector won’t let her move in with me until she has a ring on her finger.
I’m about to ask her to marry me.
The clockface on the Clocktower (Torre dell’Orologio), Piazza San Marco, Venice
I work long hours and hardly get to spend time with Flaming June. By the time I get home, she’s asleep. She told me that I’ll always struggle to balance married life and work life because I have a Sun-Pluto square. The Sun in my birth chart is at a 90 degree angle from my Pluto, making the integration of both energies difficult – but not impossible.
Pluto happens to be in the career section of my birth chart, and he happens to be my boss. The guy’s obsessive-compulsive and has no concept of time – he never takes a break. He’s also very powerful, and I’m afraid to ask him if I could work 9 to 5 instead of 24/7.
The Sun in my birth chart is who I am and what I want, and what I want is to come home at a decent time to be with my wife. She means everything to me. I guess I’ll have to find the courage to talk to Pluto about that.
Flaming June by Sir Frederic Leighton, 1895
I’ve been waiting for Tyr to come home, and I thought I’d interrupt his work and try to explain the basics of a birth chart. It will help me stay awake.
There are websites where you can get a free birth chart. Enter your date of birth, place of birth and time of birth. If you don’t have your time of birth, enter noon or midnight.
There are 12 houses in your birth chart, and every house (30 degrees) is assigned an area of your life.
Each of the 12 houses also corresponds to an astrological sign.
You’ll see that your Sun is not always in your 1st house. You may be an Aquarius Sun, but your 1st house or Ascendant sign may be Pisces. This means that you have an Aquarian heart, but you navigate the world with the intuition and sensitivity of a Pisces.
You could have your 1st house in Pisces, 2nd house in Aries, 3rd house in Taurus, and so on. Sometimes one house incorporates 2 signs, but you should always consider the sign in which the house begins to be the ruling sign: If the 1st house begins in Pisces and ends in Aries – the 1st house is in Pisces. Sometimes there are 2 houses in one sign: the 1st and 2nd house could both be in Pisces, and that’s fine.
The astrological sign of each house will flavour the house and the planets in that house. If your 3rd house is in Leo, you will be lively and expressive in the way you communicate. If Mercury is in your 3rd house, you will thrive and shine engaging with people and making connections. You’ll love the busyness of life.
Every sign of the zodiac is a part of your life, but the Ascendant sign and the Sun and Moon signs are the ones that define you the most. The Ascendant sign is how you present yourself to others; the Sun sign is who you are – your core; and the Moon sign is how you feel and express your feelings.
I always ask my clients to look for their Jupiter. Where is it? In which house and what sign? Jupiter is where your greatness lies.
The Trine and the Sextile
Oppositions, conjunctions and squares are all about work – the work that we do to build character and to have the life we want to live. The stories that come from working with these 3 aspects are stories of hardship and resilience, sacrifice, determination, perseverance and courage. They are the stories of hope we leave behind when we die.
The aspects that planets make to each other do not have to be exact to be activated: a square does not have to be 90 degrees exact to be felt. My Sun square Pluto is 85 degrees and I feel it.
I spoke to Pluto about my hours, by the way. When I asked if I could have a word with him, he looked at me with his penetrating eyes and I thought for sure I was going to burst into flames again. Lucky for me, I have Mars sextile Mercury and I’m a quick thinker. I cleared my throat and told him that I was married to a walking flame, and that I was afraid she’d burn the house down if I didn’t get home by 6. “Women,” he said. That’s actually all he said, but I’m sure he meant that it was okay for me to leave early.
Sextiles in the birth chart tell us what we’re naturally good at in a spontaneous way. Planets that are 60 degrees apart will form a sextile. A Sun sextile Neptune gives you natural charm, and a Mars sextile Venus gives you sex appeal. You’re a natural athlete with a Jupiter sextile Mars.
Trines in the birth chart show the gifts we have to offer others. Planets that are 120 degrees apart will form a trine. A Neptune and Venus trine may offer the gift of elegance. A Sun and Saturn trine may offer the gift of statesmanship. A Jupiter and Uranus trine may offer the gift of a brilliant mind. We develop these gifts throughout our lives and offer them to others when they are ripe.
With the trine and sextile aspects, we leave stories in the air that celebrate life.
Tiger Woods, Golf Masters, April 14 2019. Photograph by REUTERS/Jonathan Ernst
The Sacred Twelve
My name’s Olivine Crystal and I’m Flaming June’s sister. I’m obviously a green phoenix, and no, I’ve never burst into flames thank god. I was so worried when Flaming June married Tyr. I kept thinking, what if they were in bed together and he burst into flames? When I asked my sister what would she do, she laughed so hard that I ended up laughing too. The question remains up in the air.
Tyr’s a good guy, though. He knows that I’ve always felt a bit like an alien being green, and when he heard about Kilauea, he flew over to tell me. When Kilauea erupted, olivine crystals fell from the sky. Hawaii is now literally covered in green gems – isn’t that amazing? I hadn’t even registered that I was named after a green gem till then.
The other day, I took a break from my studies and borrowed one of my sister’s books on astrology. Isn’t it crazy that she’s an astrologer married to Pluto’s sacred bird? Anyways, it was such a beautiful day that I went outside and sat on a bench near the river to read it. I loved it! I’m actually studying Physics at the university, but I may take up astrology on the side. I’m a Pisces Sun and I’m drawn to these kind of subjects. I also have Jupiter conjunct Mercury in my career house and I get a lot of stuff that others don’t.
There are 88 constellations in the celestial sphere. What a number: 88. When you see that number, you see God. The Sun actually travelled around in his horse-drawn chariot and studied all the constellations before choosing twelve – I call them The Sacred Twelve. He chose them carefully because people would only have those twelve “sun signs” to help them through life.
Equirectangular plot of declination vs right ascension of the modern constellations with a dotted line denoting the ecliptic. Constellations are colour-coded by family and year established. NASA
I know how the Sun chose them. I could feel it. He made sure that every sun sign in the sequence would correct the excess of the previous one.
Aries does battle between the Arien need to be autonomous and self-sufficient, and the fact that when we love, we become emotionally dependent on others. The outbursts of anger that result from a sense of losing total independence and freedom, and the battle cries of I don’t need you! taper off as we reach Taurus.
Taurus willingly enters a relationship with the promise of I’ll be there for you if you’ll be there for me. There is an inherent need here for stability with a partner who is completely dependable and reliable. Right when Taurus begins to establish routines of dependence that can become stifling and prevent growth, we reach Gemini.
Gemini shatters boring routines with a need for newness. Surprise me, says Gemini, and don’t hold me tight or I’ll shrivel up and die. Gemini’s need for communication and mental stimulation cannot be satisfied by one person alone. Too much brain activity, though, will cause a build-up of nervous tension and sleeplessness. We reach Cancer just in time to slow down.
Cancer asks for a moment of introspection, a moment to retreat into our shells and get our bearings back. Be sensitive to each other’s needs, says Cancer, putting emotional responsibility on the table and nurturing us with love. We feel supported here and protected from the harshness of life, but just when things get a bit too comfortable, Leo comes knocking on the door.
I’ve got tickets for the latest show, says Leo, and I happen to be it. So, get out of your shells, dress up, feel good and come watch me perform. With Leo, we reach a stage of having it somewhat together as individuals: I AM, I AM WITH YOU, I THINK and I FEEL. Now we can develop a personality and earn some admiration. We reach Virgo before all the attention gets to our head.
I’m proud of you, says Virgo, but it’s now time to work on a skill that will be useful and of service to others. Our social integration begins with Virgo. We leave Self on the side, and begin to work on a skill under Virgo’s critical eye until we master it. Things can get rough here because Virgo demands perfection. Luckily, just when we’re about to burn out, Libra comes to the rescue.
Libra aims for a balanced life and a life of harmony. A fair give and take, cooperation, trying to get along despite differences, conflict resolution, knowing what to say and what not to say in public – all of these things belong here. Libra helps us navigate the social sphere and Libra is our social mask. When we’re about to explode with our truth, we reach Scorpio.
Speak your truth, says Scorpio, and make peace with it. Dig below your social mask, and bring out all that you’ve kept buried to conscious awareness. Know yourself and accept yourself. There’s freedom in self-acceptance. When you’re ready to step into your future, please proceed to Sagittarius.
Sagittarius opens the door to unfamiliar territory: new places, new subjects, new people. Here, we’re on a quest, looking for meaning in life, meaning outside of ourselves, and enriching our lives in the process. Before we get caught in a perpetual quest, we reach Capricorn.
Capricorn asks that we re-integrate back into society and put our new found riches to good use. We have a social responsibility to share what life has shown us with others – through our place of work, our volunteer group, the club we belong to, or in a book. When the gravitas of Capricorn becomes too much to handle, we reach Aquarius.
Aquarius reminds us of our individuality, and when we get here, we rescue ourselves. What are the compromises we are no longer willing to make? Which are the rules we will no longer follow? We notice as we take steps to change our lives that a path opens up for us: we may be offered a position more in tune with who we really are, perhaps we meet a new partner. Before we dismiss these happenings as mere coincidences, we reach Pisces.
I’m a Pisces Sun so this is my favourite part. Pisces lives with the awareness that there is a higher dimension at work in our lives. I mean, if you’re trying to change your life and someone out of the blue offers you the perfect job – isn’t that extraordinary? You’ve got to honour that moment, say a prayer of thanks. The key to Pisces, though, is to live with the awareness of a higher dimension without letting go of the reins of your life. The moment you let go, you’ll be back in Aries.
Olivine Crystal by Thomas Edwin Mostyn, 1925
Flaming June told me that I’m attracted to evolutionary astrology, and that I see the zodiac in terms of archetypes – like her sister, Olivine Crystal. I think she’s right. If you came to me and told me that someone’s taking advantage of your good nature, asking you to do all these things for them, I’d say you’re in Pisces mode. You’re not exactly surrendering to a higher dimension, but you’re surrendering to someone as if that person were a higher dimension. You’ve lost your boundaries. My advice to you would be to go into Aries mode and get your boundaries back: self-determine what you will and will not do. I know that’s easier said than done for a Pisces, but once you’re in Aries mode, you’ll find the courage. You never know, Mars may transit Aries just then and give you the extra push you need to say no, sorry, can’t do.
My name’s Ursula, and I’m a snow white phoenix. They should have just called me Snow White, but somehow, even when I was a newborn, they knew Snow White would not suit my character. I’m a Libra Sun, and to be honest, I can’t see myself cleaning the house of 7 dwarfs. I came to astrology to understand Flaming June better – she’s my best friend.
What I’m beginning to notice is that not only do signs work in sequence, correcting each other; they also work in pairs. They eye each other from across the zodiac and differentiate themselves from the opposite sign.
Aries preserves its individuality and is a pioneering spirit because it does not give in to social pressure. The ability to disregard social views and opinions allows Aries the freedom to be true to itself, to lead, and to do what it wants to do. Libra wants the same things that Aries wants, but will get them in more subtle ways and always through relationship with others. Aries defines itself on its own, and will wear red shoes when everyone else wears brown shoes. Libra defines itself vis à vis others and will wear stylish brown shoes.
Taurus and Scorpio are both tied to the earth for different reasons. Taurus is content to be what it is, and enjoys the sensuous and sensual pleasures of the physical world. If there is a number that represents Taurus, it is the number 6. 6 is about perfect give and take, and whatever Taurus takes from the earth, it appreciates. Scorpio relies on the earth for the extreme and transformative ‘ego-death and rebirth’ experiences it craves. The number that best represents Scorpio is the number 9. 9 speaks of endings and every ending contains the beginning of something new.
If Taurus and Scorpio are the sexual signs of the zodiac, Gemini and Sagittarius are the friendship signs. They are both concerned about personal freedom and self-expression, and are reluctant to tie themselves down in relationships. Gemini is the trickster who enjoys crossing boundaries and causing mischief for the sake of game-playing and mental activities. Sagittarius is the centaur-road-movie searching for wisdom. Gemini gets to know what’s going on in the world, and Sagittarius gets to understand how the world works. Making practical use of their knowledge is not the point – mind-expansion is the point for Gemini, and consciousness-expansion is the point for Sagittarius.
Cancer and Capricorn do not take risks. They are the cautious signs. Cancer will test the waters with all its defences up before entering a social situation. It will only open up to people if it feels safe to do so. Even then, it stays on the alert, ready to protect and defend itself if a remark or comment feels dishonest or hurtful. Capricorn aims to be practical and effective in the world. It does extensive research, and calculates, measures and verifies all facts and figures before forming a plan of action. If the plan fails, Capricorn knows that it could not have been done better. Chances are, however, that it will not fail.
Leo and Aquarius are signs that make a difference. Leo makes a difference on a personal level, and Aquarius on a social level. Leo reminds people to say YES to happiness. It has the soul of a performer and wants to impress people and be admirable in a genuine way. It aims to shine its light on others and help others shine their own light. Aquarius uses its genius to bring about change in society. It brings a fresh perspective to life. During Inca times, Aquarius pointed out to the Inca lord that the rains had come before a virgin was sacrificed to the gods. The rain was proof that they could break away from the tradition of sacrifices. Doubt and fear prevented the Inca lord and the rest of his subjects from making a change, but the next time the rains came before the sacrifice, they remembered what Aquarius had said.
Aries wants to build a new road that will bear its name, and Libra negotiates the contract- the road will bear two names. Taurus walks around with a sign that says Save the Trees, and Scorpio relocates them – what an experience that was. Gemini leaks some information about the contract agreement, and Sagittarius writes an article about the need for transparency at city hall. Cancer is worried about the impact the new road will have, and Capricorn does a study to reassure everyone that all will be well. Leo practices using a shovel for the ground-breaking ceremony and photo opportunity, and Aquarius points out that the city didn’t really need a new road. Enter Virgo and Pisces, and the project actually begins – the labour intensive part. Virgo adheres to ethical principles and follows instructions by the book, and Pisces corrects every problem that arises with expertise and good instincts. Together, they build a perfect road. More than any of the other signs, Virgo and Pisces know that God is in the detail. Here lies their uniqueness: knowing that ‘le bon Dieu est dans le détail.’
Ursula (Lady Agnew of Lochnaw) by John Singer Sargent, 1892
I’m a brown phoenix named after the Greek goddess of memory. Leave the initial M out and call me Nemosyne. When I look at you, my yin eye tells me who you were in your past life; it hands me a memory. You too hold this memory, but you cannot access it. It lies hidden, like the side of the moon that you cannot see. I wonder what those astronauts remembered when they orbited the side of the moon not meant to be seen – except by a chosen few. They lost contact with earth. It was just them and their memories.
I once saw two men working together. One was training the other. I saw who they had been in a past life.
They had been brothers, and their father had left them tobacco-growing lands – acres and acres of it. The older brother had kicked the younger brother out and taken all the land for himself. Over time, he had become a man burdened by the demands and responsibilities of a wealthy household. His wife and kids had reaped the rewards of his labour, while he had become tied to it. In his old age, he regretted his youthful greed and could not believe what he had done to his younger brother.
I saw his younger brother also in his old age, sitting with his dog, watching the sunset. He was savouring a sweet cigar from the land that had once been his. He knew his older brother was now regretting what he had done so many years ago. How he wished he could tell him that he not only forgave him – he thanked him for it. If he had not been left high and dry, he would never have done what he had always dreamed of doing. He had boarded a ship with his pan flute, and had sailed around the world entertaining people with his music. What an adventure his life had been.
Pluto wanted me tell the two men who they had once been and the wrongdoing they were putting to rest in this lifetime, but I refused. If they had wanted to remember, they would not have drank water from the goddess Mnemosyne’s copper bowl – the water that does not let you remember past lives. There is something precious about resolving the past without guilt. Pluto understood. I may not be his sacred bird but he loves me. He loves this gift that I have; he loves all that lies hidden, all that is secret, all that is a mystery.
Nemosyne (Woman with a Flower) by Paul Gaugin, 1891
Valley of the Moon
Like Nemosyne said, there’s something precious about resolving a wrongdoing from a past life without guilt. But what about the present? There’s also something precious about leaving the recent and unresolved past behind you without guilt. If you’re haunted by the memory of a girlfriend who broke up with you, and you’re lying down, looking like a carcass, unable to work – ask me for help. I’ll pluck the memory out of your head and leave it on the side of the moon you cannot see. Not that simple? I’ll tell you why: it’s because of the invisible strings that bind us.
You’re connected to every significant person in your life by an invisible string. You may not be feeling well one day and your sister calls to see how you’re doing. The string that connects the two of you gave her a little tug. When your girlfriend breaks up with you, you cut the string that connected you to her and it ends up back in the receptacle of your feelings; the receptacle happens to be the moon. The moon is with you for a couple of hours; she comforts you, collects the broken string, and continues going around the zodiac. When the moon reaches Aries, you’ll be thinking, how could your girlfriend have left you, how dare she! When the moon’s in Cancer, you’ll want to give your girlfriend a call and tell her that you can’t live without her. When the moon’s in Libra, you’ll realize that you shouldn’t have been so controlling; you should have let your girlfriend go out with her bunch of crazy friends and get a body tattoo if she wanted to. When the moon’s in Capricorn, you’ll feel like you’ll never find love again. When the moon comes back to you, you’ll caress the broken string, fall apart for a couple of hours, and then the moon will be off again.
This time around, you’ll hopefully be more cognizant of the things that went wrong in your relationship. When the moon’s in Aries, you’ll wonder how you put up with all your ex-girlfriend’s emotional baggage. When the moon’s in Cancer, you’ll realize how good it feels to have the apartment to yourself – no complaints about how bad your shoes smell. When the moon’s in Libra, you’ll promise yourself that you won’t interfere so much in your next girlfriend’s life – you won’t question the friends she has and you’ll let her do whatever she wants to her body. When the moon’s in Capricorn, you’ll feel more like yourself again and that you could love again. When the moon comes back to you, you’ll reminisce about your ex and still feel some guilt at the same time; perhaps you’ll fall apart, but it won’t’ be as bad as it was before. Two hours later, the moon will be off again. As she travels around the zodiac with your broken string, you’ll keep working things out in your head until you’ve integrated the lessons of this broken relationship and let the guilt go.
Now you know why I can’t simply pluck a memory out of your head and hide it on the far side of the moon. You wouldn’t be driving around so happily or taking a walk so easily with your new girlfriend if you hadn’t worked things out with the near side of the moon.
Let me introduce myself. I’m a bald eagle, and I’m the moon’s sacred bird.
The moon spends two and a half days in every sign and goes around the zodiac in a month. She sets the tone for every day and she may affect your mood, but she doesn’t change your personality. You’re still ‘you’ whether the moon’s in Taurus, Leo, Scorpio or Aquarius. That’s not the case with me. I’m a different bald eagle every two and a half days; my personality actually changes every time the moon changes signs. I’m sensitive to her. Maybe it’s because I was born during a total solar eclipse: the moon overpowered the sun on the day I was born.
You’re thinking that at least I’m the same bald eagle each time the moon’s in Leo, for example. Wrong. Each time the moon’s in Leo, she forms different aspects with different planets. The planets are always moving and never play the same symphony twice. The moon may be trining Venus when she’s in Leo one time, and then she could be solo the next time she’s there. Totally different moods and a totally different me as a consequence.
When she made a trine with Venus in Leo, all I wanted to do was to play with the young eagles. When she was solo in Leo, I couldn’t care less about the young ones. All I wanted was to do somersaults and cartwheels in the air by myself.
Listen to this, the moon was in Taurus once, making a trine with Mars. It made me take action in a save-the-earth kind of way, and I ended up eating all the dead and sick critters in the forest – I cleaned up the whole place, almost threw up. The next time she was in Taurus, she squared Mars, and I refused to move. I just wanted to laze around.
I never know what to expect when she’s in Aquarius. The last time she was there, she sextiled Neptune and I did crazy things to my hair. I wet it and spiked it and wet it again and flattened it. I was looking for a different look. Next thing I knew, all my friends were doing the same. We all ended up with the same different look.
Scorpio’s my favourite. The moon in Scorpio reveals things to me no matter what aspects she makes. If she aspects Mercury, I end up knowing what’s being left out of conversations, what the bald eagles are keeping to themselves. It’s usually things like the best place to find salmon and such. If she aspects Uranus, I find out something that’s hidden, a hidden intention; perhaps an eagle is befriending another to steal their catch.
Eclipse by Deborah Arnold, 2014 (Utah alabaster on steel armature)
“Hey dad!” Merc called the Sun. “My cell phone isn’t working again!”
“What did you expect?” answered the Sun. “Don’t you know Uranus is making his way through Taurus? Electricity doesn’t travel fast through the most earthy and stubborn sign in the zodiac.”
“What am I supposed to do?” Merc whined.
“Wait till he gets to Gemini. Things will really take off when he’s in your sign.”
“But that’s like seven years from now!”
“Sorry, kid. It’s slow down for planet Earth.”
Merc noticed something going on down below and called Mars, “Bro! One of your guys is having radio trouble!”
“What the -” said Mars, looking down. “Hey, Uranus! Can’t you go a little faster?”
Uranus sounded muffled as he made his way through granite, “Sorry, Mars, can’t do. If I go any faster, I’ll cause another volcanic eruption. Kilauea was enough.”
“Merc! Come with me! Let’s go give my guy a hand!” said Mars.
His guy was an officer trying to call for backup to arrest a drunken man, but his portable radio wasn’t working. When Mars and Merc got there, they helped the officer put the drunken man in his cruiser. The officer was about to thank them when Venus showed up.
“Hit your radio,” she told him, and the officer hit it and the radio came to life.
“What!” the men cried.
“How did you know to do that?” Merc asked her.
“Hit your cell phone, Merc,” she replied, and Merc hit it and his cell phone came to life. He was ecstatic.
“Officer, if hitting your radio doesn’t work next time, you really should use your Taser or pepper spray. Why didn’t you use them now?” Venus asked him.
“Well, I was very cognizant of -“
That’s when I showed up and interrupted. Remember me? The bald eagle? That’s right. Me. I showed up and you should have see the look on the officer’s face when I started talking.
“He didn’t use them because the moon’s in Gemini today, May 6, 2019. When the moon’s in Gemini, it’s all about collecting the facts and remaining objective, and that’s exactly what the officer did. He realized that there were all these pedestrians watching him, and it really wouldn’t look good if he Tasered or pepper sprayed a drunken man who could also potentially be mentally ill. Right, officer?”
The officer shook his head as if to say, I’m not responding to a bald eagle. I’ll just write it in an email to my higher ups.
Merc looked at the officer’s radio and shoulder extension and said, “I bet you the main unit of the radio’s working fine, but everything else isn’t. Just like Uranus is working fine but he’s trapped in Taurean armature.”
He was right. He’s the planet of communication, after all.
“If only we could set Uranus free!” said Mars. “Things happened so swiftly when he was in Aries, and them BAM! Everything slowed down.”
“He just got into Taurus,” said Venus trying to calm him. “I’m sure he’ll soon acclimatize himself to the earthy environment and start moving at a faster pace.”
“In the meantime, someone better fix the radios!” said Mars.
“Wait for a few days until the moon’s in Virgo,” I said, perched on the roof of the cruiser. “The moon in Virgo will set the ball rolling. Someone will write an article for the paper and alert the city about what’s going on, and then everyone will get practical. The experts will put their heads together, analyze the problem and start working on solutions. Maybe they’ll go wireless.”
“That will probably happen when Uranus is in Gemini,” said Merc. “He’ll be totally free when he gets there.”
Free Uranus! (The Oracle) by Deborah Arnold, 2019 (Serpentine and glass on steel base)
Pica-pica, Woodpecker and Bald Eagle were hanging out together. They had finished attending one of the workshops at the yearly Sacred Bird Conference and were sharing a meal.
“We’ll be able to see the Summer Triangle after sunset,” said Bald Eagle.
“What’s that?” asked Woodpecker.
“Three fixed stars that form a triangle in the summer sky: Vega, Altair and Daneb,” said Pica-pica. “Doesn’t Mars teach you anything, Woodpecker?”
“Yeah he does. He just told me all about these defective portable radios. Boy was he mad.”
“There’s a story about Vega and Altair that might interest you, Pica-pica,” said Bald Eagle.
“Tell me,” she said, getting comfortable.
“Niulang was a cowherd on earth, and Zhinu was a weaver girl and daughter of the goddess of heaven,” began Bald Eagle. “One day, weaver girl came to earth to bathe in a lake and she fell in love with the cowherd. They got married, and were living happily on earth, until the goddess came looking for weaver girl. She needed her to go back to heaven and weave clouds. When weaver girl refused, the goddess punished her and separated her from her cowherd. She left weaver girl in Vega and the cowherd in Altair.”
Mercury’s Pigeon had come over to the group just in time to hear the story.
“That’s terrible!” he said. “They didn’t even have cell phones back then! What a cruel goddess. Where’s this story from?”
“China,” said Bald Eagle. “I heard it on one of my trips to China. But wait – I haven’t finished yet.”
“Carry on,” said the Seagull from Heaven. He too had been drawn to the group.
“Weaver girl was so miserable, she refused to weave clouds,” Bald Eagle carried on. “All she did was cry and cry. Her sisters took pity on her and begged the goddess of heaven to let her meet her cowherd. The goddess finally relented, but she said that they could only meet once a year: on the seventh day of the seventh month. The question now was how they’d meet; there was a river of stars separating them.”
At this point Pica-pica was in tears. Woodpecker moved closer to her and put his wing around her.
Bald Eagle continued, “Weaver girl’s tears had caused floods all over China. Every creature in the country knew about her grief, and when they heard the goddess give her daughter permission to meet the cowherd, they all got together to see if they could make this happen. The magpies came up with an idea: they’d fly to heaven and form a bridge of magpies between Vega and Altair so the lovers could meet.”
“Did they?” sobbed Pica-pica.
“Yes they did,” said Bald Eagle.
“It’s no wonder that Venus, goddess of love, chose a magpie to be her sacred bird,” said Woodpecker, drying Pica-pica’s tears.
“Tell us another story, Bald Eagle,” said the Seagull. “But nothing so melancholic. We don’t want Pica-pica causing a flood.”
“So you’re in the mood for stories… The moon must be in Sagittarius today,” said Bald Eagle, and he began to tell another one.
The same group of sacred birds got together the following day in between workshops. Bald Eagle noticed that the Seagull was agitated, which was very unusual. He asked him if everything was okay.
“Not really,” said the Seagull. “I found out in my seminar that China’s national space program landed a craft on the far side of the moon earlier this year. It upset me to know that the far side of the moon was being explored. I know that it’s symbolic when you say that our past life memories are on the side of the moon we can’t see, but for some reason, the thought of a space craft there upset me.”
“I thought the moon blocked communication between the far side and the earth,” said Pica-pica.
“It does,” said the Seagull. “Before they launched the space craft, they launched a relay satellite to halo-orbit the moon. The satellite is positioned in such a way that it can transmit information from the far side to the earth.”
“I read about that,” said Pigeon. “The space craft is named after the Chinese goddess of the moon, Chang’e.”
“Yes it is,” said Bald Eagle. “And, believe it or not, the satellite’s name is Queqiao which means magpie bridge – taken from the story I told you yesterday. Except here, the magpie bridge is transmitting geophysical data from the goddess of the moon to the earth.”
“So you knew about the space craft?” the Seagull asked Bald Eagle.
“Yes, and it upset me too.”
“Isn’t this something,” said Pigeon.
“Out of this world,” said Pica-pica.
“You’re telling me that there’s a satellite in space transmitting data from the far side of the moon, and we can’t get radios to work on earth?” said Woodpecker in disbelief. “Wait till Mars hears about this!”
“He’ll be furious,” said Pigeon. “He’ll probably go fight with the chief of police.”
“He can’t,” said Woodpecker. “The guy retired and they’re still looking for a new one.”
“Well, they better find someone who can solve transmission problems,” said Pigeon.
“Someone with good instincts,” said the Seagull.
“Someone born with the moon in Pisces,” said Bald Eagle.